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#1966 OldBogey

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    Defining and analysing humour is a pastime of humourless people

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Posted 05 November 2019 - 02:36 PM

The room was full of pregnant women with their husbands.

The instructor said, "Ladies, remember that exercise is good for
you. Walking is especially beneficial - strengthens the pelvic muscles
and will make delivery that much easier.

Just pace yourself, make plenty of stops and try to stay on a soft
surfaces, like a grass path.

"Gentlemen, remember -- you're in this together.  It wouldn't hurt you
to go walking with her.

In fact, that shared experience would be good for you both."

The room suddenly became very quiet as the men absorbed this
information. After a few moments a man, name unknown, at the back of
the room, slowly raised his hand.

"Yes?" said the Instructor.

"I was just wondering if it would be all right, if she carries a golf bag?


 


  • xrman1954 likes this
Golflink
Olinda Golf Club
Warragul Country Club
People say that nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
West Gippsland Veterans Champion 2017 & 2018
Olinda Golf Club B Grade champion 2018
Warragul Country Club C Grade champion 2019

#1967 OldBogey

OldBogey

    Defining and analysing humour is a pastime of humourless people

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Posted 05 November 2019 - 02:37 PM

A big earthquake with the strength of 9.9 on the Richter scale hits the  Middle East .

Six million Muslims die and over a million are injured.

Iraq , Iran and Syria are totally ruined and the governments don't know where  to start with providing help to rebuild.

The rest of the world is in shock.

The USA is sending troops to help keep the peace.

Saudi Arabia is sending oil.

Latin American countries are sending clothing.

New Zealand and Australia are sending sheep, cattle and food crops.

The Asian countries are sending labour to assist in rebuilding the infrastructure.

Canada is sending medical teams and supplies.

GREAT BRITAIN , not to be outdone, is sending six million replacement Muslims.

God Bless GREAT BRITAIN , damn those Brits are smart!!


Golflink
Olinda Golf Club
Warragul Country Club
People say that nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
West Gippsland Veterans Champion 2017 & 2018
Olinda Golf Club B Grade champion 2018
Warragul Country Club C Grade champion 2019

#1968 Francie

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Posted 05 November 2019 - 10:27 PM

Two snakes were slithering along in the rough of a golf course....

 

One says to the other "Are we poisonous snakes?" 

His mate replied, "No, why do you ask?"

 

The first snake says, "That's good,  because I just bit my tongue."


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#1969 Turfers Paradise

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Posted 22 March 2020 - 07:03 PM

Pisser Frank
DEBUT: US Masters, Augusta National Golf Club, Augusta, GA 2016
DEBUT: ANA Inspirational LPGA Mission Hills, Palm Springs, CA 2016
Reacquainted myself with Karrie Webb, Australia's Greatest Golfer
Winner C Grade Gross 90/70 01/06/2019 Monthly Medal


‘99% of short putts do go in, they are the leftovers of your original putt’

#1970 OliviaM

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Posted 19 November 2020 - 03:23 AM

What did the left eye say to the right eye?

Between us, something smells!






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