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Barnesy05: Desperately Unlucky


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#1 Left is Dead

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 01:39 AM

Life throws curve balls all the time...today I received mine, but first let me go way back to the beginning...

 

I took up the magnificent game of golf at age 12 after caddying for my dad a few times on a Saturday morning, at Wakehurst Golf Club on Sydney's Northern Beaches.  I moved through the ranks from Cadet, then Juniors, serving time as Junior Captain, playing every Saturday with my dad and the senior members then every Sunday with the Juniors,  running Junior comps and festivities even back then. Finally I moved on to full membership. Here I served on the Match Committee, and was apparently being groomed as Club Captain.

 

In one particular year, 1989, during a 6 month purple patch,  I achieved what I felt was about all I could in this magnificent game. I won my first of 2 A Grade Monthly Medals...in the early days the MM was only awarded to outright on the day but changed sometime to one for each grade.  I felt a bit ripped off but it was pointed out to me that I would have taken it out had there only been an outright given. Next I scored my one and only Hole in One and a 1/5 in Stableford, helping me and my partner to win the fourball that day. Finally I managed to get my handicap into single figures, proving to myself that I could actually play a decent game of golf. Mind you, under the handicapping system of the day dropping and gaining strokes was fairly easy and a week later I was back to 10, never dropping below again.

 

A few years later, with a wife, new baby girl and a mortgage, life was different and finding the time for golf became increasingly difficult. Eventually something had to give and after 27 years at Wakehurst I decided to end my membership, a massively hard decision. I took up squash, eventually playing competition. It was a lot of fun, less time consuming, gave me some exercise and was much cheaper (sound like me?).

One day  a mate asked me to have a hit (of golf) with him, hadn't hit a ball in 4-5 years, can't remember where we played or how I went but I do remember the feeling...it hit me there and then...I really do miss playing this game of golf, I love it. Financially and time wise I still couldn't see myself joining a club as a full member so I discovered the Riverside Oaks deal of a "lifestyle" type membership. Only being able to play a handful of game s year this was perfect. I said sayonara to the Squash and set about reclaiming a handicap. Just before I did this though I had another social round at Riverside Oaks, this time recording my best ever score of 76 (+4). I don't ever recall breaking 80 before that day. After putting in my 5 cards I was expecting a 14-16 h'cap and sure enough it was 15. I was happy with that considering the amount of golf I could play. I then moved a golf day that I started back in 1988 (and still going today) to RSO which helped me fulfil my 3 games a year obligation there.

 

In July 2007 I saw this website called Iseekgolf and it had info and offers on it that interested me, so I signed up, but I never knew what the forum was until October 2008, after playing a pro-am with Bob Shearer, I sat down in front of the computer at lunch and explored Iseek. There I discovered the forums and spotted a thread attacking the senior players, basically saying they were a waste of space...and the rest is history.

I got into it fairly intensely, as you usually do with something new, though I was treated, like many newbies, with a sense of caution, mainly due to my all guns blazing entry. Eventually I was "accepted" as one of the forum regulars. Friendships were forged over the keyboard however it wasn't until we decided to have a round and could finally put a face to a name that these friendships were cemented.

 

I like to muck around as much as the next bloke, I'm just a big kid and I love to have fun but somehow my jokingly talking myself up overtook anything else I had done in the forums and an "urban legend" was born...so I ran with it.  The banter was only between a few blokes but as time went on more and more got on the bandwagon, so when the new forum software was created it gave me plenty of room to keep on building the persona, especially with the signature. Desperately Unlucky was to become my "signature "saying and I played it to death.

 

Unfortunately not many of the great folk in the forums know the real Barnesy05, he was super shy and quiet as a kid, using humour to get him through difficult situations. This carried on for many years and still does, to a point today. I am a very friend orientated person..ie I love to spend time with them, sometimes not a popular choice when the missus just wants us time. I love to help others whenever I can and i really enjoy running events, like parties, large gatherings like club functions and golf days. I am heavily involved in Junior Barnesy's Football (Soccer) Club, managing his team the last 9 years, and holding various committee positions like Vice President and PR-Media (which I am currently).

 

This takes up a massive amount of my time, luckily work from home, so it is not as big a burden but none the less time consuming. Being self employed should be a godsend but small business is tough, there are pros and cons but looking at all my mates that work in big business, while they talk about retiring here and there, all I can think about is working until I drop. Just before Xmas last year we lost a very close friend after a 3 year battle with cancer. I have lost people close to me before but this one was different, I just found it hard to grieve, sure I was sad but I just couldn't seem to "let go". I thought I got past it, but my missus is still struggling and I think it's fair to say I haven't quite understood why.

 

Why tell you this? Well I think it is starting to catch up a little. A month or so ago I wiped everything from my signature, changed my profile pic and profile information. The banter was a little heavier than usual, something I should have been able to handle, but for some reason I couldn't. I decided to flick all that was about me and just slip in as the average contributor (never gonna happen though). I was happy that someone else was doing my job of organising the next NCCSSC Golf Day, something I love to do. My golf had gotten progressively worse over my last 3 games, why I don't know but I was really looking forward to getting together with the boys for the Newcastle game.

 

The banter was its usual self, building up fairly strongly, maybe even a little more than the norm and at one point I did feel like withdrawing, but thought better of it. I played like and absolute gumby, so much so the I never uttered the words desperately unlucky, because I was shite. What was causing it? I didn't think influences outside of golf would affect my game as the golf course is the one place in the world that I can go to and not think of anything but the golf I'm playing. I did notice yesterday however that bad shots were getting to me. It's never happened before.

 

Now to where I started this blog...today...

I received word that a post I had made was a catalyst for a member to email madam telling him that he was offended by a comment I made towards him and that he wished to have his name removed from the Nationals list and would cease to frequent this site, effective immediately. I was flabbergasted and couldn't work out where or what I had said, I mean I had only recently been PM'ing this member helping him with troubles he was having navigating this forum and all seemed good.  He was happy and he was happy to bag me out like everyone else, and I was ok with copping it.

After I discovered what his complaint was I felt shock at first, then gutted.

 

I have never gone on to this forum and intentionally slagged anyone maliciously, it has always been with my tongue firmly planted in my cheek. The use of the emoticons certainly helps. My guts were turning as I sat in front of the screen bewildered. Had all that I have going on outside of here and what thought was under control subconsciously flowed on to my posting? I didn't think it was any worse that what has been posted before, the swear word was hidden when post was saved.  I wrote an apology and PM'd it to this member but apparently he won't see it as he has cut off all communications with ISG...so just in case he stumbles across this thread by mistake, here is my message to him:

 

"I have been informed that I have over stepped the mark and caused you some angst.

Many things around this place are said in jest and my 99.9% of my comments are taken this way. You have seen many of the comments directed at me, I should have bailed long ago, I know they are (mostly) having a lend, but I love the joint and the blokes (and girls) in here and have made some great friendships here.

 

I wholeheartedly apologise for upsetting you and any ill feeling I have caused towards me, but more importantly towards the Iseekgolf forums and fraternity. The word you may have interpreted was not what I think you think it is...if that makes sense.

 

If you choose not to return then so be it but I will be disappointed if out of all the posts between us, you have chosen to judge me on that one indiscretion and leave Iseek."

 

Cheers and good luck

John (Barnesy05) 

PS: I have deleted the alleged offending comment

 

It would be easy to just say "meh, so what" but I reckon that this is the best forum with the best people going 'round and to think that one little comment made in jest has set someone off so much that they will never visit again bothers me.  However we shall battle on as there are bigger problems in the world.

 

On the brighter side I'm really looking forward to the Nationals, just hope that whatever is affecting my game is gone by then.  Let's see where this journey takes me, if you are interested...I love playing golf with my mates....see you all in October.


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#2 The good Egg

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 05:01 AM

Blah blah blah :)
If someone cant take a lil banter I think it shows there lack of character and they need to take a lesson in understanding it.
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#3 Weetbix

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 07:09 AM

That's a bummer John. One of the things I like about the forum is that I can get to know people a bit here in a way that is comfortable as I feel shy and awkward in social situations with people I don't know - I'm a real introvert. But there is enormous scope for misunderstanding on a forum.

I recognise the guy churning feeling you're talking about.

Hopefully the person who was offended will reconsider, but the Dr does have a point that often it is the individuals circumstances that dictate their response more than what is actually said.

That's not just true about forums actually.

I look forward to catching up in October and finally getting to have a hit together - no ducking me this time! :)

All the best mate
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#4 GhettoGolfer

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 07:34 AM

As much as we'd all like to be friends, reality is that we can't all be. Why should you let one person's reaction determine your frame of mind?

You're a tosser of the highest order and glad you're part of the club!
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#5 Francie

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 08:07 AM

Well that's 20 minutes of my life I've just waisted.    :D  :D

 

Seriously though.........to open yourself up like you have and tell this "little world" of Iseek about yourself takes courage.   We all have, and had, our own issues over time.......and how we deal with them does show what type of person we are.    Some on here, constantly offend and I'm sure they make a concerted effort to achieve that....but having spent some time with you...I'm convinced  the intent wasn't there.

 

Unfortunately the typed word can easily be miss-understood so you have publicly apologised.   Hopefully the member does see reason and understands your intent.    There are people on here who I don't agree with or give me the shites....so I choose other ways.   There are other options to continue on this site without taking your bat and ball and going home.   As I said.....it's how you deal with things in life that show your true character.    Some are more extreme than others.


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#6 Dr.inky

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 08:29 AM

FFS, I had to read through all of that to find out you like playing with small balls...

 

I share the sentiments above...

If I had to taken offense to something said by someone, I'd contact the person directly and provide that opportunity to clear the air and set records straight, If that is not offered, then, that goes a long way to show that I 'm just as much to blame.

 

So sort yourself out, as I don't want a grumpy turd as a playing partner at the nationals...we are playing a round together aren't we?


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#7 golden warrior

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 08:38 AM

I'm still hurt :-)

The written word is easily misinterpreted, don't worry about it.
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#8 Madambo

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 09:39 AM

Hey Barnsey

 

I know how you feel-  I have had this same type of thing happen a couple over the past couple years, and I have moved on. It shows you care. People are in this forum for so many different reasons, many we dont know about, but hopefully we are assisting in some way by being here for them

 

I also know the feeling about the golf game!  FYI my last round was with SEQ Boys over Christmas break!  

 

Im hoping the member does read this and/or the PM you sent. Ive not had any response back from mine. 

 

We can only be who we are and let people accept who we are.

 

There are some great people on here and Im always moved when a person opens up like you have.  (So off to the loo now before it moves anymore;)   j/k :P


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#9 Left is Dead

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 09:56 AM

Blah blah blah :)
If someone cant take a lil banter I think it shows there lack of character and they need to take a lesson in understanding it.


I knew you'd understand :P
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DON'T LET THE BLACK DOG WIN...

 

HELP IS OUT THERE

 
 
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2013 ISG NSW WBT COC Runner Up

2015 ISG NSW WBT COC

2nd ISG NSW Life Member Inductee

2012 ISG National Championships...Inaugural Supreme Putting Champion

2013 ISG National Championships...3rd Place 2nd Round - Moonah Links

2013 ISG National Championships...13th place...now that's desperately unlucky

2014 ISG National Championships...13th place...no other golfer could be that desperately unlucky 2 years in a row!

2015 ISG National Championships...21st place...that's farked

2016 ISG National Championships...waaaaay down the list.

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Yarra Yarra Satellite Game 

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Huntingdale Satellite Game

2016 ISG National Championships...Captain of winning NSW Team, SOO

2017 ISG National Championships...12th place...heading in the right direction

2017 ISG National Championships...Winner The Lakes Satellite Game 43pts

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Life Motto: "If it's free, it's for me!"

 

 

 

 

Team Live4BarnEsy...forever undefeated angel-2-smiley-emoticon.gif

 
Desperately Unlucky ©


#10 Left is Dead

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 10:06 AM

That's a bummer John. One of the things I like about the forum is that I can get to know people a bit here in a way that is comfortable as I feel shy and awkward in social situations with people I don't know - I'm a real introvert. But there is enormous scope for misunderstanding on a forum.
I recognise the guy churning feeling you're talking about.
Hopefully the person who was offended will reconsider, but the Dr does have a point that often it is the individuals circumstances that dictate their response more than what is actually said.
That's not just true about forums actually.
I look forward to catching up in October and finally getting to have a hit together - no ducking me this time! :)
All the best mate


Thanks Weeti, I'm similar when meeting new people, I guess the advantage here is that you meet via a keyboard first and avoid the awkwardness of trying to create a conversation face to face.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy meeting new people and it usually doesn't take me long to figure them out. A case in point was the Waffler, lots of banter between us before we finally met, at a Status Quo concert. We then moved yo the golf course where I really got to know him. A very complicated character that tells it like it is, quite often to his own detriment, but deep down a heart of gold. We still smash each other on Facebook :)

Oh, and there is no chance of escaping me this year, I'm ready for Team Sea Eagle to take flight. ;)
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A

 

DON'T LET THE BLACK DOG WIN...

 

HELP IS OUT THERE

 
 
5 Time ISG NSW WBT Winner

2013 ISG NSW WBT COC Runner Up

2015 ISG NSW WBT COC

2nd ISG NSW Life Member Inductee

2012 ISG National Championships...Inaugural Supreme Putting Champion

2013 ISG National Championships...3rd Place 2nd Round - Moonah Links

2013 ISG National Championships...13th place...now that's desperately unlucky

2014 ISG National Championships...13th place...no other golfer could be that desperately unlucky 2 years in a row!

2015 ISG National Championships...21st place...that's farked

2016 ISG National Championships...waaaaay down the list.

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Yarra Yarra Satellite Game 

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Huntingdale Satellite Game

2016 ISG National Championships...Captain of winning NSW Team, SOO

2017 ISG National Championships...12th place...heading in the right direction

2017 ISG National Championships...Winner The Lakes Satellite Game 43pts

2013 Brass Yacht Winner (Inaugural)

2014 Brass Yacht Winner

2015 Brass Yacht Runner-up

2016 Brass Yacht Winner

2017 Brass Yacht Winner

 

 

HOLE IN ONE

2017 ISG NATIONALS ROUND 2 RIVERSIDE OAKS 17TH HOLE BUNGOOL COURSE FIRST SHOT OF THE DAY (SHOTGUN START)

 

Life Motto: "If it's free, it's for me!"

 

 

 

 

Team Live4BarnEsy...forever undefeated angel-2-smiley-emoticon.gif

 
Desperately Unlucky ©


#11 Left is Dead

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 10:08 AM

As much as we'd all like to be friends, reality is that we can't all be. Why should you let one person's reaction determine your frame of mind?
You're a tosser of the highest order and glad you're part of the club!


Yeah mate I get it, I am the first to acknowledge that not everyone can be on the same page, how boring would that be, I mean agreeing with everything Kiwi says (shuddering) :)

Is my membership number for the tossers club on its way? ;)
  • GhettoGolfer and Madambo like this

A

 

DON'T LET THE BLACK DOG WIN...

 

HELP IS OUT THERE

 
 
5 Time ISG NSW WBT Winner

2013 ISG NSW WBT COC Runner Up

2015 ISG NSW WBT COC

2nd ISG NSW Life Member Inductee

2012 ISG National Championships...Inaugural Supreme Putting Champion

2013 ISG National Championships...3rd Place 2nd Round - Moonah Links

2013 ISG National Championships...13th place...now that's desperately unlucky

2014 ISG National Championships...13th place...no other golfer could be that desperately unlucky 2 years in a row!

2015 ISG National Championships...21st place...that's farked

2016 ISG National Championships...waaaaay down the list.

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Yarra Yarra Satellite Game 

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Huntingdale Satellite Game

2016 ISG National Championships...Captain of winning NSW Team, SOO

2017 ISG National Championships...12th place...heading in the right direction

2017 ISG National Championships...Winner The Lakes Satellite Game 43pts

2013 Brass Yacht Winner (Inaugural)

2014 Brass Yacht Winner

2015 Brass Yacht Runner-up

2016 Brass Yacht Winner

2017 Brass Yacht Winner

 

 

HOLE IN ONE

2017 ISG NATIONALS ROUND 2 RIVERSIDE OAKS 17TH HOLE BUNGOOL COURSE FIRST SHOT OF THE DAY (SHOTGUN START)

 

Life Motto: "If it's free, it's for me!"

 

 

 

 

Team Live4BarnEsy...forever undefeated angel-2-smiley-emoticon.gif

 
Desperately Unlucky ©


#12 GhettoGolfer

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 10:12 AM

Yeah mate I get it, I am the first to acknowledge that not everyone can be on the same page, how boring would that be, I mean agreeing with everything Kiwi says (shuddering) :)

Is my membership number for the tossers club on its way? ;)

You're on the board, as expected.
1st rule of tosser Club, we do not speak of tosser Club.

Edited by GhettoGolfer, 17 June 2014 - 10:14 AM.

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#13 Left is Dead

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 10:13 AM

Well that's 20 minutes of my life I've just waisted.    :D  :D
 
Seriously though.........to open yourself up like you have and tell this "little world" of Iseek about yourself takes courage.   We all have, and had, our own issues over time.......and how we deal with them does show what type of person we are.    Some on here, constantly offend and I'm sure they make a concerted effort to achieve that....but having spent some time with you...I'm convinced  the intent wasn't there.
 
Unfortunately the typed word can easily be miss-understood so you have publicly apologised.   Hopefully the member does see reason and understands your intent.    There are people on here who I don't agree with or give me the shites....so I choose other ways.   There are other options to continue on this site without taking your bat and ball and going home.   As I said.....it's how you deal with things in life that show your true character.    Some are more extreme than others.


Only 20 mins? Obviously skipped a few paragraphs! :P

The typed word or sentences cannot show emotion, and that's why I like the use of the emoticons, the fact that he chose to ignore it tells me something.

You have spent time in my company and apparently we will be doing it again, that tells me something as well...you are loopy!!! :)
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A

 

DON'T LET THE BLACK DOG WIN...

 

HELP IS OUT THERE

 
 
5 Time ISG NSW WBT Winner

2013 ISG NSW WBT COC Runner Up

2015 ISG NSW WBT COC

2nd ISG NSW Life Member Inductee

2012 ISG National Championships...Inaugural Supreme Putting Champion

2013 ISG National Championships...3rd Place 2nd Round - Moonah Links

2013 ISG National Championships...13th place...now that's desperately unlucky

2014 ISG National Championships...13th place...no other golfer could be that desperately unlucky 2 years in a row!

2015 ISG National Championships...21st place...that's farked

2016 ISG National Championships...waaaaay down the list.

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Yarra Yarra Satellite Game 

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Huntingdale Satellite Game

2016 ISG National Championships...Captain of winning NSW Team, SOO

2017 ISG National Championships...12th place...heading in the right direction

2017 ISG National Championships...Winner The Lakes Satellite Game 43pts

2013 Brass Yacht Winner (Inaugural)

2014 Brass Yacht Winner

2015 Brass Yacht Runner-up

2016 Brass Yacht Winner

2017 Brass Yacht Winner

 

 

HOLE IN ONE

2017 ISG NATIONALS ROUND 2 RIVERSIDE OAKS 17TH HOLE BUNGOOL COURSE FIRST SHOT OF THE DAY (SHOTGUN START)

 

Life Motto: "If it's free, it's for me!"

 

 

 

 

Team Live4BarnEsy...forever undefeated angel-2-smiley-emoticon.gif

 
Desperately Unlucky ©


#14 Left is Dead

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 10:14 AM

You're on the board, as expected.
1st rule of tosser Club, we do not soak of tosser Club.


Soak? There is water involved in this tosser club?

A

 

DON'T LET THE BLACK DOG WIN...

 

HELP IS OUT THERE

 
 
5 Time ISG NSW WBT Winner

2013 ISG NSW WBT COC Runner Up

2015 ISG NSW WBT COC

2nd ISG NSW Life Member Inductee

2012 ISG National Championships...Inaugural Supreme Putting Champion

2013 ISG National Championships...3rd Place 2nd Round - Moonah Links

2013 ISG National Championships...13th place...now that's desperately unlucky

2014 ISG National Championships...13th place...no other golfer could be that desperately unlucky 2 years in a row!

2015 ISG National Championships...21st place...that's farked

2016 ISG National Championships...waaaaay down the list.

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Yarra Yarra Satellite Game 

2016 ISG National Championships...2nd place Huntingdale Satellite Game

2016 ISG National Championships...Captain of winning NSW Team, SOO

2017 ISG National Championships...12th place...heading in the right direction

2017 ISG National Championships...Winner The Lakes Satellite Game 43pts

2013 Brass Yacht Winner (Inaugural)

2014 Brass Yacht Winner

2015 Brass Yacht Runner-up

2016 Brass Yacht Winner

2017 Brass Yacht Winner

 

 

HOLE IN ONE

2017 ISG NATIONALS ROUND 2 RIVERSIDE OAKS 17TH HOLE BUNGOOL COURSE FIRST SHOT OF THE DAY (SHOTGUN START)

 

Life Motto: "If it's free, it's for me!"

 

 

 

 

Team Live4BarnEsy...forever undefeated angel-2-smiley-emoticon.gif

 
Desperately Unlucky ©


#15 Schmuck

Schmuck

    Dead Cat anywhere

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Posted 17 June 2014 - 10:15 AM

Soak? There is water involved in this tosser club?


Liquids ?
Nothing makes sense, except GOATS, they ALWAYS make sense

Ever noticed that Ducks swagger?

I am only half trying




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