That’s just lovely. :)

Where’s ya bin burkey?

He has binnaway Barnesy ;-)

Yep, I thought that would pop up…

...where’s he wheelie bin? :)

Ives bin everywhere man…..iv’e been to jail jail jail, megatharra megatharra, hospital, jail, megatharra….....ive been every where man….....lol

Mate just been behaving myself up here in sunny north queensland, working looking forward to a break at christmas like most people I guess. I don’t seem to troll the pages much more buy I may make an effort to check your funnies more oftern mate…..........

Ives bin everywhere man…..iv’e been to jail jail jail, megatharra megatharra, hospital, jail, megatharra……..ive been every where man……..lol

Mate just been behaving myself up here in sunny north queensland, working looking forward to a break at christmas like most people I guess. I don’t seem to troll the pages much more buy I may make an effort to check your funnies more oftern mate…….......

“can you see my ball?’

“Yer over there, behind the front of that tree”

Champion! :)

Pity you didn’t make it to the National Day on the GC in September, was a great weekend.

Victoria next year…start saving :)

Barnesy and Mrs Barnesy were sitting watching a tv program explaining the phenomenon of mixed emotions.
Barnesy turned to his good wife and said, “Honey this is bullshit. I bet you can’t tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time”.
She said” Out of all your friends you have the biggest dick”.
and that’s when the trouble started!!!!!

A mate was in a Chinese restaurant and ordered some soup. When the waiter returned with a bowl of soup, my mate looked at it with some trepidation and asked “what’s in this soup”? The waiter replied, “come from some boy”!

…..and that’s when the trouble started.

Apologies in advance.

A well known Aussie golf pro writes a book about life on tour and jumps onto ISG to promote….and that’s when the trouble started.

I was watching Inception again with my wife and I turned to her and said you should try that, and she replied what, see if a top will stop spinning and I said no, jump out a window, and that’s when the trouble started…....

SOMEONE ASKED ABOUT CLUB FITTING IN MELBOURNE,,,,,,

A YOUNG MALE DJ PRETENDED TO BE A QUEEN,,,,,,,,,,,

I was in bed with my wife, we were getting quite amourous, we commenced coitus, and while we were both kneeling I reached around, cupped her breasts, and whispered in her ear “Julie at work has much bigger boobs than you”, and thats when the trouble started….............

Apparently …..This letter was actually sent into Veet…. (hair removal cream maker)
Dear Sir or Madam,
“After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits. Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus’s birthday as a bit of a treat.
I ordered it well in advance and working in the North Side of town I considered myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types…oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was. I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn’t have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.
Religion hadn’t featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg. Struggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair.
Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief. I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned.
Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn’t managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my butt. This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found its way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain. The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.
Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, butt in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my butt while muttering…” Ooooh that feels good ”.
Understandably this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn’t heard her come in it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction. I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn’t the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn’t improve my status…
So to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect…....”

Yours truly
Desperately unlucky

…..and that’s when the trouble started.

Apparently …..This letter was actually sent into Veet…. (hair removal cream maker)
Dear Sir or Madam,
“After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits. Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus’s birthday as a bit of a treat.
I ordered it well in advance and working in the North Side of town I considered myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types…oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was. I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn’t have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.
Religion hadn’t featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg. Struggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair.
Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief. I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned.
Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn’t managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my butt. This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found its way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain. The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.
Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, butt in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my butt while muttering…” Ooooh that feels good ”.
Understandably this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn’t heard her come in it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction. I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn’t the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn’t improve my status…
So to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect…….”

Yours truly
Desperately unlucky

…..and that’s when the trouble started.

http://www.golflink.com.au/...

VISION TEST TEAM PILOT #006

Peg has Bear_Vision

Hey…..that wasn’t BarnEsy was it????

Right….you blokes have started something you cAnt finish!!
(just change that capital for another letter)

Cint

cEnt?

Cont?

Not many left now….......

Not many left now……....

9/10/12 – Hole In One – 7th Hole Portsea GC
2012 (Official) Winner of Inaugural ISG Nat. Champs.
2011 Inaugural winner Vict. Order of Merit Putting Champion – Long Island

http://www.golflink.com.au/...

And I for one aint going anywhere near that other vowel…....... ;-)

I am not going near you either Peg

I am not going near you either Peg

I am number six double three

After reading about where ya want to place ya hands….... Maybe that is good…..........

Rang my girlfriend and when she answered I said “Is that the best looking girl on the Gold Coast”, “Yes” she replied happily.
“Well what have you done with my girlfriend!’
...thats when the trouble started.

Rang my girlfriend and when she answered I said “Is that the best looking girl on the Gold Coast”, “Yes” she replied happily.
“Well what have you done with my girlfriend!’
...thats when the trouble started.

That’s better :)

The other day after being out and about with the boys on the town all afternoon, I arrive home early and pretty drunk. My partner goes to me “Honey what would you like for dinner”. I said I’m not hungry after sex. She replies, we never had sex today.
...thats when the trouble started.

After a fun Australia Day, whereby much beer was consumed, I did everything I could to reduce my Lambnesia and watched the rerun of our new Australian citizens taking the pledge, I thought I would do something to confirm my part in our multicultural status, so I went to see a Muslim cover band.

They were called “Bomb Jovi”. They were brilliant. Their last song “Living on a Prayer Mat” almost brought the house down.
This bloke that I was sitting next too, I think he called himself, Itwazim Farqwivme, starts bragging about how he has the entire Koran on dvd.

Wanting to obvioulsy impress my new found colleagues, I inquired, “Can you burn me a copy?”

And that’s when the trouble started